The benefits of an expectations exchange


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Issue 15 - December 2003

Success file by Bob Levoy
The benefits of an expectations exchange

Chiropractors often have unrealistic expectations about recently hired associates – and vice versa. These one-sided, unspoken expectations often lead to disappointment and resentment on both sides. They’re based on the presumption that each person will cooperate in a plan that has never actually been discussed between the two.

Reality check: People often enter into business relationships with entirely different agendas. Even worse, they never discuss these agendas and invariably one or both individuals are surprised when things don’t turn out as expected.

Chiropractors, for example, will complain that recently-hired associates:

• Haven’t spoken to community groups, written articles or engaged in other activities to promote themselves and the practice;

• Spend too much time with patients;

• Haven’t networked with physicians, attorneys and others in a position to make referrals to the practice; or

• Haven’t taken an entrepreneurial interest in the practice.

And when you talk with associates, they, too, have complaints about on-the-job, unexpected surprises such as:

• The constant pressure to work faster, see more patients, produce more revenue;

• Nighttime and weekend coverage of the practice;

• The slow progress of increased compensation, benefits and eventual partnership.

• The lack of a “voice and a vote” in such matters as the establishment of office policies, purchase of new equipment or hiring decisions.

The problem that has no name

“We live in a culture, especially at work, that prefers harmony over discord, agreement over dissent, speed over deliberation,” writes Leslie A. Perlow, Associate Professor at the Harvard Business School in her book, When You Say Yes But Mean No, (Crown Business, 2003). “Whether with colleagues, friends or family members, the tendency to paper over differences rather than confront them is extremely common. We believe the best thing to preserve our relationships and to ensure our work gets done as expeditiously as possible is to silence conflict.” She dubs it: “The problem that has no name.”

“If no one expresses their thoughts, Perlow adds, “people will likely continue thinking and behaving in the same way and nothing will change. Problems are likely to persist and may even get worse because corrective actions are not taken.”

One of the costs of silencing conflict, Perlow says, is the effect it has on our motivation and engagement. When work relationships are marked by pent-up frustration, our work suffers and it is hard to be motivated. “We don’t experience a reason to put much of ourselves into our job, be creative or go above and beyond the call of duty. Instead we may lose interest in our work and start to disengage from it and our organization – psychologically, at first, and then often physically, by quitting. This is highly costly for both individuals and organizations.”

The failure to have up-front discussions about such matters is understandable. A chiropractor is anxious to find an associate and doesn’t want to scare off a good candidate by making excessive demands about the future — any more than a prospective associate wants to jeopardize a good career opportunity by doing the same.

On the other hand, without discussing such expectations at the start, it’s unlikely everyone will end up as they say, “on the same page.” Disappointment for one or both parties is inevitable.

The solution: At the outset of the business relationships, initiate an expectations exchange with a prospective associate. Let him or her know your priorities and reasonable expectations and what, if any, timetable you have in mind. Ask the associate do the same. To reach agreement, you and the prospective associate may have to negotiate and compromise.

Also, consider drafting a letter that spells out your understanding of the arrangement. It won’t ensure compli-ance, but it might eliminate the vague-ness that can lead to later misunder-standings and disappointment.

Bob Levoy is a seminar speaker and writer. He can be reached at 516- 626-1353.

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